This Ted Talk is absolutely brilliant, even if you don’t read a word of my post, take the 8 minutes and 47 seconds to watch this video and have your mind blown. What would you do if you could control someone’s attention? It’s an interesting question. Ultimately, isn’t that really what we are trying to do with every interaction we have? We want that attractive person at the bar to notice us, our manager to take note of our efforts and hard work, our spouse of significant other to realize just how much we do for them. These things are not done in a manipulative way but many times it seems as though we try to shift other people’s focus from our flaws to our strengths.

What is the problem with that? Well, unfortunately, sooner or later, the real you comes through. I propose a different solution to relationship issues than trying to distract or misdirect the people around you. Shift your attention and focus onto yourself.

So many times in life we spend so much time looking outside for fulfillment, adoration, and understanding. Very rarely do we take the time to look inwards and develop the one thing we have the most control over in our lives, ourselves.

Are you misdirecting yourself? Are you giving your attention to things that shouldn’t be attracting your focus? Are you spending your time and energy doing things that are tearing you down rather than bringing you closer to your dreams?

Give yourself a moment to really reflect and understand if you are misdirecting yourself. Really consider, am I doing the things right now that will bring me the most happiness now and in the future. If you are miserable at your job, are you giving it your best effort and looking for opportunities elsewhere? If you are unhappy with your weight or physical appearance, are you spending time to learn to love yourself for you and making small changes to improve what you can change?

Ultimately, I feel that your attention can be put in one of two areas. Your attention can either be focused on fear or on hope. We all face challenges, we all have trials and tribulations in our lives, what is the most important is how we react and move forward when we are challenged.

Unhappy in your job:

Attention on fear: What if I lose my job? What if I’m stuck here forever? What if my boss doesn’t recognize all my hard work?

Attention on hope: What if I turn things around at work? What if this is a sign that there is something far better for me out there? What can I do today to work towards my real dreams and goals?

Everything comes down to where you choose to focus your attention. Now ask yourself, are you misdirecting yourself, or are you honestly expressing who you are and working towards your dreams?

Mom, I love you so much. Dad and you have always worked to help Evan and I shift our focus to the good in every challenging situation. Whether it be issues at school, a relationship ending, or difficulty in our careers you have always encouraged us to pick our heads up and look forward into the future with hope. Thank you both for being that shining light of positivity in our lives.

Love,

Brian